Mike is 36, an Army veteran and has been abusing alcohol and stimulants since before he became part of our family when he was 15. Crying is not a stranger to me. The weeks and months before he took this step towards recovery were horrific for all of us- his wife, his biological mom, his foster family- all the people that collectively love him. After suffering a stroke that was directly related to his substance abuse, he came home unstable- angry, violent, disengaged. He c

One codependent friend in recovery shared this story with me: I was taught that Jews didn’t drink or drug. We were married young. I just always assumed that my husband started drinking because I was a terrible wife. The suffering, the hurt and the anger that company codependence can consume you. Don’t let it. Don’t be angry at yourself, at your daughter, at her compulsive eating. Don’t be hurt by your father’s gambling. Hurt and anger will not pave the road to recovery and he

It means living under the delusion that life is controllable. It means constantly struggling to maintain the illusion that you are controlling it. It means lying to yourself all day, every day, insisting that, with enough effort, you can get life to do whatever it is that you want it to do. It means having to match your failure at controlling life by blaming others – your parents, your spouse or partner, your children, your colleagues, your friends – for your failure. It me

In synagogue was read one of the most famous phrases in the Torah, ‘na’aseh venishma’, literally, “we will do and we will hear” (Ex. 24:7). What does this mean and why does it matter? In the Babylonian Talmud, it is taken to describe the enthusiasm and whole-heartedness with which the Israelites accepted the covenant with God at Mount Sinai. When they said to Moses, “All that the Lord has spoken we will do and we will hear”, they were saying, in effect: Whatever God asks of